Mushy

I figure that there may be one or two people who actually read this blog (and not consistently at that) - and I am 99.9% sure they are related to me. That being said, somehow this blog has turned into more of my own way of putting down stuff that I need to get out of my head. So if it's too much, my apologies (especially because recently it's become what some may refer to as a little 'mushy').

Ever wanted to say something to someone - and then you hear the perfect song lyrics? That happens to me a lot. Though, usually, it's not something I'll actually say, just something I want to say - but will keep bottled up.

These are those lyrics today (only slightly adjusted for gender purposes):

Right here waiting, staying strong
Come and fall into me

You say you've turned it off, hid your heart upon a shelf
Scared of what it might cost to take it down for someone else
'Cause loving her you lost too much of yourself
Baby can't you see that she's not me

And I need you to know you can fall into me
That my arms are wide open and will always be
Right here waiting, staying strong
Come and fall into me

I'll follow any road anywhere to get to you
I'll open us my soul if that's what you need me to do
Now baby its your move all you've got to do
Is believe in love, just believe in us

"Fall Into Me" (by Emerson Drive)

Warned you it might be mushy. Oh well, that's my heart recently. Mushy. No matter how hard I try not to be.

What Faith Can Do

So many times we forget what Jesus said in Matthew 17:20. "...Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."

I am thankful that beyond my minuscule faith, the faith of many other god-fearing, righteous people have influenced not only my life, but the world I live in.

I don't know that I've heard it said better than through these lyrics:

I've seen dreams that move the mountains
Hope that doesn't ever end
Even when the sky is falling
I've seen miracles just happen
Silent prayers get answered
Broken hearts become brand new
That's what faith can do.

What Faith Can Do (Kutless)

Lunchtime Phone Calls

Mornings filled
Trying to accomplish work
Trying to keep up with life
Trying to maintain perspective
Trying to just get through
All covered and accomplished
With the ring of a phone
And a whisper of hello

Slow

Just trying to understand "slow." On-line I have found these definitions:

1. boring: so lacking in interest as to cause mental weariness

Nope, not that one.

2. Slow was a Canadian punk rock band in the mid-1980s

Well - I don't remember them, so that doesn't count either.

3.decelerate: lose velocity

Definitely not.

Guess I'll just have to wait until the definition of "slow" becomes clearer.

Defining lyrics

2 AM and I'm still awake, writing a song
If I get it all down on paper, it's no longer inside of me,
Threatening the life it belongs to...

Anna Nalick - Breathe (2 a.m.)

It's late and I'm feeling so tired
Having trouble sleeping.
This constant compromise
Between thinking and breathing.

Corrine Bailey Rae - Trouble Sleeping

Just pieces of lyrics that resonate this week.

Oasis?

Afraid.

Fear of wandering in a

Self-imposed wilderness

Created from dreams

Long laid to rest -

Only to find an oasis,

and wonder -

Is it real or

Will it disappear

in an instant?

Criminal Minds

My favorite crime drama is Criminal Minds. As much as I hate to see great characters leave good T.V. shows - I think the writers did a fantastic job in the very last scene of last week's episode. These next couple of paragraphs were 'JJ's' words to the director of their unit - and they're fantastic.

"I’m thankful for my years spent with this family, for everything we share, every chance we had to grow. I’ll take the best of them with me and lead by their example wherever I go. A friend told me to be honest with you, so here it goes:

This isn’t what I want, but I will take the high road. Maybe it’s because I look at everything as a lesson or because I don’t want to walk around angry; or maybe, it’s because I finally understand. There are things we don’t want to happen, but have to accept; things we don’t want to know, but have to learn; and people we can’t live without, but have to let go."

Jennifer 'JJ' Jareau (A.J. Cook - Criminal Minds)

Inadequate

Feeling inadequate
to help,
to lighten or
carry a burden.

Attempting to provide
distraction,
a smile or
just a breath of air.

Striving to
connect,
comfort and
provide refuge

Wondering if my
desire,
yearning or
longing echoes in you.

Distortion

Emotions so surface
that feelings quiver under my skin.
Desire to touch, smell, taste, and speak
becoming passion, dormant before, now active.

Struggling to protect
yet eager to glimpse the future path.
Distance separating what could be
and shielding what cannot.

Striving to allow room to breathe
while contemplating how to cross the void.
Doubts infusing that which appears real,
giving life to distortion within.